Our decision to sell our 4-bedroom house and move to a 2-bedroom rental probably perplexes many people, but I’m finding there are many who do understand. Right now, I cannot say that we are truly simplifying our lives–as the stress of a new job and moving, along with our tantrum-happy toddler makes life anything but less complicated. But we are finding ourselves re-examining some key values and liking what we are finding.
Much of what some people describe as voluntary simplicity calls to me and my family. Unfortunately, it is a topic risky with implicit comparison and judgement against those who have and spend more money. But I’m not saying we are “better,” it’s just that we have found our priorities shifting and the stark contrast around us makes us more aware of how much we used to take for granted.
Behind the house we sold, our would-have-been-new neighbors tore down a tiny old house and have built a two-story that is the largest house on the street. They cut down the trees (the trees were dying anyway) and suddenly one day, we looked out and where there had been only green, there was now a two story house looking down into our back yard.
It is a nice house. And I can totally remember a time when I would have dreamed of something like that. But I don’t anymore. I don’t want that. I’d rather have more time to do things I want and more freedom from mortgage and debt to spend money on other things.
As I was searching for information on bunk beds, I ran across Internet discussions of parents inquiring whether it was “legal” to allow two kids of different gender to sleep in the same room. We actually have reached a point where people think it might be illegal to not buy one bedroom per child! Well, folks, we’re going to put all three in one room; don’t call DSS on us!
I love the location where we live now. We are only a block away from Islington Center and a 5 minute walk from the train to Boston. The other morning I walked down to the Barber Shop at 730am, sat in a room full of men waiting to get haircuts, then caught the train to the city. I felt like I was in an episode of “Mad Men” or something, but the haircut turned out OK. Yesterday, the neighbors across the street showed up with homemade cookies to welcome us to the neighborhood!
It’s a small house…but it fits. The kids bedroom magically fit a twin bed, toddler bed, and crib, with room for 2 dressers and a changing table…all in a 12×11 room. Our kitchen is just the right size for our kitchen table to fit against the window and seat 5. The living room and dining room merge together in an open floor plan that allows us to have all our living space in essentially one big room. Our bedroom…OK, an 8.5×10 room is pretty small, but so far so good. And our front porch is closed and usable as a playroom. I figure we are living in about 800 square feet now–vs. the 1900+ we left.
How long can we “stand it?” I don’t know…I’m thinking we’re going to like this. We sold a lot of stuff we’d had for 10 years or more and moved around with us–some of it hadn’t been unpacked since California. There are so many things…you realize, “why do I have 6 pairs of jeans when I wear the same ones over and over?” I’m sure I’ll have more observations as living small becomes more routine, but so far, I like the feeling of efficiency and sustainability.
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I can absolutely identify with your sentiments. It’s funny how so many people think they need a big house and big yard and lots of space for all their “stuff”. Kudos to you for downsizing. I’ve definitely found that there is a positive tradeoff to be made by sacrificing space for location. And as you’ve discovered as well, you actually don’t need that much space to live comfortably. For one thing, it forces you to buy a lot less “stuff” in the first place. Each purchase becomes a decision: Do I have room for this new item? Do I really need it? With so much of our lives being electronic (music, bills, even books) the need to store physical things is decreasing. Plus a smaller space mean less to clean! As you are finding as well, it’s great to have a smaller place in a location where you can actually walk to the store and have a chance of bumping into friends and neighbors. Bigger is not always better!
I love what you did. And I want you to know you are in forefront of a movement. I think smaller is the way we will all go soon, some voluntarily (like you), others kicking and screaming. Have you read Bill McKibben’s “Deep Economy”? If not, do so. You will feel so good about what you did!
Hi Dave,
Very interesting article. You think about it, people in Europe and especially Japan utilize a lot less space for their living quarters than do Americans and don’t appear worse for wear. I’ve lived in a 2,000 sq.ft house and no a 1,450 and like it a lot better. Less cleaning and less furniture to buy.
I completely understand you on the cleaning part. We are not home enough, to justify a mcmansion. Growing up in a family of nine with one bathroom, I chuckle at the inability of many to imagine sharing a bathroom, let alone a sink with another household member. We sometimes bump into each other, but I do not mind.
I can relate completely. At the PEAK of the real estate market in 2005, we sold out large 5 bedroom home in Sharon Ma and moved to Plymouth and bought a 2 bedroom home with cash from the proceeds of the sale, that was a third the size or the one we sold. It is a 40 yard walk to the beach, and a complete life-style change for my wife and I. Our 5yo loves the beach and relaxed neighborhood feel. While my wife misses massive closets, it was the right move for us as a family and we love it! Living mortgage free is the way to live! No stress!
From facebook and twitter I’ve been following your family’s shift, while my family has been doing the opposite. We just shifted from living in about 1200 s.f. (2 kids, ages 4 and 2) to about 2200, although in the same house.
We were living on just the top floor of our 100 year old character house, renting out the main floor and basements. We now have taken the main floor back as a large open kitchen-living-dining space.
What I’ve noticed so far is fewer conflicts between the kids. Somehow having more space means they spread out and don’t fight over the same toy so much. They also seem to be playing together much more.
Will be interesting to see if you (or your wife) notices a difference in conflict levels.
And a question: do you have any problems with your kids going to sleep at bedtime? Whenever we have to put our kids in the same room (when travelling), they laugh, giggle, jump etc. and basically don’t settle down for a couple hours.
Does it get better after a week or so if they all sleep in the same room?
Hi Wendy – a response for you from Dave’s wife. My kids do fight over the same toys and rough-house but the amount of that behavior has not increased in a smaller space.
Surprisingly, there has been absolutely no trouble with bedtime. Two of our children shared a room before we moved and they made a lot more noise then than they do now with the 18 month old baby in their room. I am amazed and pleased. They chat a little bit with each other, even sing sometimes, and go to sleep.
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